Prelude to The Tough-Zone Part 1: What does “Tough” mean?

Inigo Montoya:You keep using that word. I do not think it means
              what you think it means. 

A few words before we enter the Tough-Zone: Tough is not what you think it is. Being tough has nothing to do with winning a fight, establishing dominion over others, being “right” or enduring pain for its own sake. Let’s look at some dictionary definitions of tough

Tough [tuf], adjective:

1.   sturdy; hardy: tough troops.

2.  not easily influenced, as a person; unyielding; stubborn: a tough man to work for.

3. hardened; incorrigible: a tough criminal.

4.  difficult to perform, accomplish, or deal with; hard, trying, or troublesome: a tough problem.

5.  hard to bear or endure (often used ironically): tough luck.

6. vigorous; severe; violent: a tough struggle.

7.  vicious; rough; rowdyish: a tough character; a tough neighborhood.

8. practical, realistic, and lacking in sentimentality; tough-minded.

For our purposes, none of these definitions will do. We live in a society where blame, excuses and victimhood often take center stage. People have a problem BEING tough. Perhaps this is because they do not UNDERSTAND tough.  Further, when trying to cope with difficult circumstances, many choose to play  the role of tough; to try to live up to the inadequate definitions above. You can’t fake tough.

Can you imagine the hero in your movie saying, “This is my greatest challenge ever. I am going to become stubborn, vicious, and hardened. I’m going to make everything I do look difficult. On top of that, I will be callous and unapproachable, so that no one can endure my presence.” Sounds funny but how many people who think they are “tough” do just that?

Tough means one thing:

The ability to perform at a high level NO MATTER WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES.

When you are in the Tough Zone you are boundless, unflappable. You feel relaxed and give off an aura of enjoyment and enthusiasm. You are flexible and make everything you do look easy. You are caring to others. People are naturally drawn to you.

Here are some phrases that adequately describe what being in The Tough Zone means:

1. Being  “In The Zone”
2. Being “In the Flow”
3. Realizing your Buddha nature or Christ nature.
4. Being at one with “Stillness” or “The Now.”
5.Rising Up
6. Connecting to the Power Within, to The Light (of God if you wish), or to Inspiration.

These don’t sound much like the dictionary definitions of tough. However, think about it for a second. Toughness is a power you draw from within, not an image or caricature you project to others. My favorite example of  “Transforming to Tough” (Triple T) is the character Neo in the movie “The Matrix.”  Neo begins the film as Thomas Anderson, a wispy computer hacker burdened by fear, self-doubt and a feeling that his life is incomplete. Neo ends the movie as The One, a limitless man in complete control of his mind and the physical world around him.

Getting into the Smart Zone is easy. All you need is a little but of talent, a lot of hustle and some good advice. Entering  the Tough Zone takes every bit of strength you can summon: physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. It’s tricky to get there and harder to stay there.  However, accessing the rare air of The Tough Zone is the fuel you will need to see your journey to a fulfilling conclusion. (Notice I said fulfilling not successful) In the coming chapters, we will further define the Tough Zone. I will give you the tools to get there and stay there./p>

Look forward to going all the way down the rabbit’s hole together (Take the blue pill…Matix reference, hopefully not too obscure).

Peace begins with me

Coach Dave

The Smart Zone: The Final Phase – Introspection

You did it!!

1. You answered The Call to Action

2. You became the ultimate Nerd.

3. You found a world-class mentor/coach

4. You hustled

5. You hit The Wall…..maybe over and over.

6. You Made it Your Own – You learned, you evolved, you improvised. Your journey became something more than you could have planned.

Your Call to Action has come to fruition, or at least to a resting point (i.e. the end of a season in an athletic career).  No matter what the end result, you have a beautiful story to recant. This chapter of your movie was, no doubt, interesting and eventful. Pause for a moment. It’s time to look inside yourself and answer a few questions:

1. Am I doing what I want? Am I doing it powerfully?

2. Do I really prepare the way champions and élite performers prepare?

3. What obstacles repeatedly pop up in my movie?  I am I clear about them? How can I better respond to adversity?

4. How have I changed during the course of my Call to Action? What changes would I like to continue to make?

5. What would I do differently given the same challenge? Is this a journey I would like to repeat?

6.  How am  I sharing my Call to Action with others?

7.  Did the results ever really matter? (I’m sure during your Call to Action it will feel like the results are all that matter.  This is natural. Ask yourself this question many times as time goes by and see if your answer changes).

8. How tough am I? (This is a question I will discuss in great detail in coming post)

Perhaps my favorite television series ever is N.F.L. Film’s “America’s Game.”  This series profiles every Superbowl winning team from the 1960’s to the present. “America’s Game”  illustrates introspection at it’s best.  Each episode documents a particular year and a particular Superbowl champion. The show flows in narrative fashion with in-depth interviews of three members of the team. They describe not only what the season was like, what the team was like, what the era was like, but what their journey meant to them.  Over and over again the players and coaches recant the same message: “It was about the guys playing next to me.” Winning the championship was secondary. The friendships they made, the memories they have, the growth they witnessed are infinitely more valuable than their diamond laced Superbowl rings.

Introspection is a critical part of your journey.  You do not have to wait until your Call to Action reaches completion to look within. However, introspection is very difficult  when you are in the heat of battle. Often, it takes time and space to gain proper perspective. Before you answer the next Call to Action, take some time to reflect.

WHEW!! We made it through the Smart Zone. Practical, rational advice. Right? Now we are going to move sharply to the other side of the brain. It’s time for me to blow your mind. It’s time for me to give you the tools to constantly perform your best ……while you navigate through the Smart Zone. It’s time to get tough.

COMING SOON TO TOUGH-SMART: THE TOUGH ZONE

Much love and holiday blessings,

Peace begins with me

Coach Dave

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The Smart Zone Step 6: Make it Your Own

By now, you’ve probably guessed that Coach Dave is a big fan of cinema. (Yes, I just referred to myself in the third person….and it felt great!!)  I am especially a fan of independent (“indie”) films. Why? The endings in independent films are so random. The allure of indie film lies in the freedom characters have to respond to challenges.  These are not cookbook characters, confined to traditional Hollywood scripts. Independent films resemble real life.  Some have happy, somewhat predictable endings. Some indie flicks have very depressing endings, where the hero does very little to resolve conflict.  The very best indie films have unexpected endings, in which the characters evolve. They overcome adversity by transforming their very nature.

I'm a huge Wes Anderson fan

Why do we love it so much when a  character in a film transforms? Why are we so deeply moved?  After all, a movie is  just a two-dimensional image on a screen. Why do our eyes well up with tears (just admit it) when our hero finally figures things out?  We experience these emotions because we know we have the same potential within us.  We want to change for the better too.

I the last segment of the Tough-Smart Blog, we talked about The Wall. It’s a harrowing, frustrating, challenging time when our Call to Action may seem  in jeopardy. What to do when: despite your inspiration, despite your knowledge, despite the solid advice of your mentor, despite your incredible hustle, you fall flat on your face? Most people choose to quit. They become victims. The blame bad luck or unfair circumstances. They run out of gas. You, however, are not most people. You are Tough-Smart. When faced with the difficulty, fear and uncertainty The Wall presents, you will Make it Your Own.

The Make it Your Own Phase is the difference between having “But Then” or “And Then” as the ending to your story:

I answered my call to Action. I studied. I prepared. I listened to my mentor.  I really hustled…

“but then, I had some bad luck.”

“but then, no one would give me a chance”

“but then, I ran out of money“

“but then, I got hurt”

“but then, I got burned out. It just wasn’t fun anymore.”

I answered my Call to Action. I studied. I prepared.  I listened to my mentor. I really hustled. For a while I hit The Wall…

“and then, I came up with the most amazing idea.”

“and then, I met someone who made the difference.”

“and then, my journey turned into something completely different, even better than my original Call to Action.”

“and then, most random thing happened that changed everything.”

“and then,  I took 100% responsibility for my journey. I knew the time had come for me to make some changes.”

The Wall is the central conflict in the movie you call your life. You can produce any kind of movie you want. If you desire a mundane, depressing ending to your Call to Action, so be it. There is no law against it. Personally, I feel like I wasted my $7.50 when a film ends like that. For my journey, I prefer a quirky, unexpected, even bizarre ending that is far better than the ending I envisioned at the start.

Throughout  the Smart Zone I emphasized learning a world-class system and following the advice of your coach. During the Hustle Phase, I suggested to stick to this system, even when you had doubts. I told you the time for innovation would come. When you hit The Wall, the time for creativity is NOW!  The advice of an expert, world-class as it is, can only deliver you to the threshold of success. You are not a carbon copy of your mentor nor is your Call to Action. Putting your personal stamp on your journey is exactly what will get you past The Wall.

During the course of  your journey you will probably think, “If I was doing things my way I’d do this.”  In fact, you’ll probably think it a thousand times. The key to success with Tough-Smart is to take note of these little epiphanies. However, wait until the proper time to apply them. Ride the advice of your mentor until the last possible minute. Anticipate hitting The Wall. Then, when The Wall comes, go for it! Evolve. Improvise. Make it Your Own.

My favorite Make it Your Own story is that of John Smith. This legendary Oklahoma State wrestler lost a heartbreaking match in the 1985 NCAA finals. After this loss, Smith took a “red shirt” year away from college competition. He trained harder than ever before. He reexamined his wrestling style. He innovated.  Finally, Smith invented the Low Single Leg Takedown or “Low Single.”  This technique, a unique and new approach to attacking an opponent’s legs, became Smith’ s signature move.  Smith became unstoppable.  The low single revolutionized wrestling and led John Smith to two NCAA championships, four world titles and two Olympic Championships.

John Smith winning an Olympic Gold Medal

The Make it Your Own phase is when you take 100% responsibility for everything in your movie. During this phase your approach may have to change, the nature of your journey may have to change, YOU MAY HAVE TO CHANGE!! This does not imply failure: not doing exactly what you set out to do. It implies tremendous success. When you Make it Your Own, you re-invent yourself and redefine success.

As always, I welcome your Tough-Smart stories in the comments section.

Peace begins with me,

Coach Dave

The Smart Zone: Step 5: The Wall

In cinema, sequel movies are typically a disappointment. Granted, Rocky II was awesome (especially when Rocky finally caught that chicken). Come to think of it, Rocky III was amazing too (Clubber Lang invented trash talking ). However, these films are exceptions to the rule. Rocky IV, Rocky V and Rocky VI all stunk in typical sequel fashion. In general, we must agree, sequels almost never reach the creative peak of the original movies that spawned them.

Yo Adrian! How does this apply to Tough-Smart? More specifically, How does this apply to your Call to Action?
Let me walk you right through the subtleties of my Stallone reference:

You decided Life as Usual was not for you. You answered your Call to Action. You enjoyed the N.E.R.D. Phase enough to Find a Coach/Mentor. You Hustled your *ss off. Then, the funniest thing happened.  After some initial success, your Call to Action halted in its tracks.

Your journey has taken an unexpected turn.  Perhaps it has even taken a few steps backward. You have encountered adversity that no one could have predicted. You have endured criticism (sometimes constructive, sometimes not) from places you never would have expected.You’ve been frustrated at times. You have doubted yourself and questioned the very system that  got you to where you are. You now realize that your Call to Action will definitely not proceed the way you planned.

Great job!! You’ve hit The Wall. Consider yourself in élite company. John Elway lost three Superbowls in humiliating fashion before becoming a two-time World Champion. Dana White and the Ultimate Fighting Championships (U.F.C.) almost closed shop before becoming one of the premier entertainment companies in the world. Albert Einstein languished in obscurity before his theory of relativity revolutionized modern physics.

Hitting the wall is a natural part of any great endeavor. That’s the anatomy of success. Now that you have hit The Wall, you must ask yourself the pivotal question of your journey: “What would the hero in MY movie do.” Would Neo pack it in when the Oracle told him he wasn’t “The One.” Would Superman become a victim when Lex Lugar chained him to kryptonite.  What would Rocky do? (WWRD?)

Remember, YOU are the hero in your movie. (You are also the producer, director and projector. We will get to that later). What’s more, your movie is not a cheap sequel. It’s a blockbuster original.  You are not a carbon copy of your mentor. You are unique. You talents are unique. Your journey is unique.  The Wall is the phase where most people’s Call to Action ends.  They become frustrated, disillusioned, burned out. They quit. You, however, are Tough-Smart. This offers tremendous advantages: 1. You knew The Wall was coming. 2. You know The Wall is a sign of impending success. Anticipating and even welcoming The Wall  allows  you to respond proactively, with a sense of creativity.

There’s no telling how long The Wall phase will last. Evolution can be a slow process. Here are some tips to help you stay on track:

1. Stay Cool Like Fonzi – Hitting The Wall is natural.  Your movie would be totally boring without it.

2. Stay hungry – Every day, remind yourself why you love what you are doing

3. Inject certainty – The Wall is an illusion. You will succeed. It’s simply a matter of when.

4. Stay tough – We will talk at length about the Tough-Zone.

5. Show gratitude – Constantly be thankful for what you do have. Constantly be proud of how far you have come.

6. Keep hustling – Anyone can hustle when things are going great. Tough-Smart people hustle no matter what the conditions.

I know many of you are hitting The Wall as you read this. In the next edition of Tough-Smart we will talk about how to get past this scary and strenuous phase. In the meantime, stay Tough-Smart.

Peace begins with me,

Coach Dave

The Smart Zone – Step 4: The Hustle Phase

Happy holidays and God bless, Tough-Smart Nation. Let’s continue our tour through the Tough-Smart System by expanding on the Smart Zone. In Step 3 of The Smart Zone, we moved out of the N.E.R.D. Phase and found a world-class mentor/coach. As I mentioned, your mentor will compel you to work harder than you ever thought possible. He/she will also introduce you to a world-class system, which will allow you to work efficiently.

Step 4 in the Smart Zone is to Hustle; to make hay while the sun shines; to push yourself; to bust your butt. Whatever you choose to call it, Step 4 in the Smart Zone is about maximum effort. Executed correctly, The Hustle phase should not differ vastly from the N.E.R.D. Phase. It should still be fun.  After all, your are directing your hard work toward your personal Call to Action, your passion.

Unlike the N.E.R.D. Phase, the Hustle Phase is about producing results. If your Call to Action is to open a business, the Hustle phase is when you open up your doors and start producing revenue. If you are an athlete, the Hustle phase is when you start  having an impact in competition. It’s time to take the training wheels off. It’s time to keep score.  Your efforts now count.

During the Hustle Phase, it is vitally important to do things exactly the way your mentor taught you. Trust the system you’ve learned. The time for innovation will come later. In The Hustle Phase, focus on doing everything possible to enhance your chances of success. If your world-class system calls for you to practice something 100 times, then practice it 1000 times. If your mentor asks you to learn a new skill, then learn it so well that you could teach it to a 4-year-old. During the Hustle Phase, be obsessive/compulsive. Pay attention to detail. Go overboard.  By the way, questions are the bane of the Hustle phase.  Save them for later. The mantra of the Hustle phase is “over-prepare and under-think.”

In the N.E.R.D. Phase, living in the Smart Zone was sufficient. Your focus was solely on enjoyment. Starting with the Hustle Phase, living in the Tough Zone pays large premiums. In future chapters we will talk in-depth about Defining Success, Overcoming Ego, Overcoming the Victim Mentality and other “Transforming to Tough” principles. Suffice it to say for now that the Hustle Phase is NOT the time to: 1. Feel sorry for yourself. 2. Worry about what you are getting out of the process. 3. Take a vacation 4.Come up with your own grand plan.

There is no greater example of Hustle than Charlie Lewis Jr.(aka “Mask”). In 1997 Mask and his associate Dan Caldwell founded Tapout, a clothing line targeted at the mixed martial arts community. The Tapout crew hustled in legendary fashion, initially selling their gear out of the back of their car. Wherever and whenever there was an MMA competition, Tapout was there. They relentlessly pedaled their clothes, their brand and their image. From a gross of $30,000 in 1999, Tapout’s earnings rose to $100 million in 2008. Tapout also has a reality show, a video game and a popular magazine bearing its name. Tragically, after inspiring so many, Charlie “Mask” Lewis died in the Spring of 2oo9.

Just Hustle. Pursue your Call to Action with tenacity. Surprisingly, not many people know how to truly push themselves. In the Hustle phase, rise above your natural inclination to take it easy. See how good you can really be. Remember your Call to Action isn’t just about you. You are sharing it with the World… and the World deserves your best.

R.I.P. Mask.  You inspired and energized me

Peace begins with me,

Coach Dave

Breaking down Josh McDaniels’ journey the Tough-Smart way

I grew up in Denver, Colorado. Like most native Denverites, I am a huge Denver Broncos fan. The Broncos have a rookie head Coach, Josh McDaniels. McDaniels has seen his share of adversity in his first season. Can we predict, at this early stage,  whether McDaniels’ tenure in Denver will be a success?Yes we can. I believe Josh McDaniels is well on his way to becoming an élite head coach in the N.F.L. Why? Because he is Tough-Smart. Let’s break down his journey the Tough-Smart way:

The Smart Zone

Step 1: Call to Action
Josh McDaniels’ call to action is singular and unequivocal: To coach an N.F.L. team to a Super Bowl Championship.

Step 2: The N.E.R.D. phase
McDaniels has this step aced. The N.E.R.D. phase likely began early on for Josh.  McDaniels, the son of a prominent high school football coach, has studied the X’s and O’s of football since he was a young child. He has easily eclipsed the 10,000 hour rule in his preparation to become an N.F.L. coach. A math major in college, Coach McDaniels is comfortable with nerd-dom. Long hours, tedium, extreme attention to detail and an obsessive/compulsive nature are part of his Tough-Smart D.N.A.

Step 3: Find a coach/Find a system

“I had been talking to Bill for a few years about being a head coach, and after I didn’t do any interviews during the bye week in the ’07 playoffs he said, ‘I will help you in any way I can to get you ready for all the other things that go into the job,'” McDaniels said. “Just being around him every day was going to help me from a football standpoint because I could see what he did and how he did it. But he was saying he would help me with some of the things that you won’t really get a chance to witness or understand or become knowledgeable about until you’re in that position.

“I remember when we first came back after our break, that very first day, that very first morning, he brought me into his office and he gave me five pages, typed, of all the topics and things that he felt like I needed to be educated about to become an effective head coach. I’m thinking to myself, here he’s got 10 or 12 days where he can do whatever in the hell he wants to do — we’ve just come off a season where we were 16-0 and lost in the Super Bowl — and the very first day back he gives me this? That was kind of like my bible.”

Josh McDaniels on his mentor, Bill Belichick

McDaniels gets an A+  on this step. Josh was personally mentored by Bill Belichick, head coach of the New England Patriots. Belichick is certainly a world-class coach, if not the greatest of his era. From all accounts available, McDaniels was an apt pupil, listening to and absorbing ALL of what Belichick had to offer. McDaniels was certainly given a rare opportunity, but there is no denying that: 1. He earned it (see Hustle) 2. He made the very most of it.

Stage 4: Hustle
Again, McDaniels receives an A grade. While only 32 years of age, the Broncos new coach has been in the NFL coaching ranks for a decade. McDaniels started as a low-level assistant for the Patriots.  While helping the Pats to three Super Bowl wins, McDaniels’ work ethic clearly distinguished him from other aspiring coaches.

Stage 5: The Wall
I believe this is the current stage of Josh McDaniels’ journey. The Wall is the stage where realize that your journey will definitely not proceed as smoothly as you had planned. You encounter adversity that no one could have predicted. You encounter scrutiny and criticism that test your resolve and your belief in yourself. The Wall forces you to question the very beliefs, the very system that got you to where you are. There is no telling how long The Wall phase will last. So far McDaniels has responded to hitting The Wall with relative grace.

Step 6:  Make it your own
Early on, Josh McDaniels proceeded with his new charge just as the Tough-Smart system would dictate:  1. Do things exactly the way your mentor taught you. 2. Hustle.  3. Anticipate hitting The Wall with a sense of opportunity and optimism.
McDaniels,  I believe, has come to the crucial “aha moment” that will move him beyond The Wall. Josh has begun to grasp that the  Patriots’ system, world-class as it is, can only bring him to the threshold of success. In the all important Make It Your Own Stage, the Broncos’ head coach will realize that he is Josh McDaniels — JOSH FREAKIN’ MCDANIELS, not a carbon copy of his mentor. He will realize that he possesses talent and insight that is unique in all the world. He will evolve. He will adapt. He will manifest his Call to Action in his own image.

Stage 7 – Introspection

Time will tell with this step. I believe Josh McDaniels story will be one of success, personal growth and fulfillment.

The Tough Zone

Josh McDaniels lives in the Tough Zone. Let’s analyse some of the aspects of McDaniel’s mindset that will be invaluable to him on his journey.

1. Overcoming your toughest Opponent: Ego
There is only one person who can stand in the way of Josh McDaniels’ Call to Action: Josh McDaniels (if you were thinking Jay Cutler we have some work to do). In order to enter the Tough Zone, one must overcome Ego.  This includes more than overcoming feelings of self-importance. Ego can rear its head as judgement, fear, anger,  blame, depression, selfishness, anxiety, etc.  Many in the media have accused McDaniels of “having a big ego.”  Guess what? Every human being on Earth has a big Ego.  However, everyone manifests it a different way. Our primary task in life is to overcome Ego. I believe Josh is doing a better job of overcoming Ego every day. Just look at the way he has expertly guided Brandon Marshal’s development from spoiled diva to team leader.

2. Overcoming the Victim Mentality.

“I wasn’t the most well-liked person in Canton,” he said. “I was a coach’s son who played quarterback. It was tough at times.”

Josh McDaniels gross under-representation of the pressure of growing up in football crazed Canton, Ohio

Coach McDaniels is not a victim. It is clear that Josh does not let things “happen to him.”  He is not overly concerned with others’ opinion of him. He does not subscribe to the concept of bad luck. McDaniels accepts 100% responsibility for everything in his movie. McDaniels  responds (much to the chagrin of the media) to “good” and “bad”  situations with exactly the same mantra: “We need to get better.”   Perfect.

Defining Success

Coach McDaniels focus at any given moment is on improvement.  He clearly understands that success is a direction, not a destination.  To Josh: PROCESS = PROGRESS = SUCCESS.  He consistently  avoids the “Are we there yet?” mentality. Analyse McDaniels comments at any press conference. They do not center on his team’s wins and losses. They focus on his team’s development.  Coach McDaniels realizes that his job as an N.F.L. head coach is not to win every game. His job is to constantly compel his team to more closely resemble a Super Bowl contender.

There are other elements of the Tough-Zone, such as Sharing, Removing Separation and Connecting with the Divine that I cannot address. I do not know Josh McDaniels personally. I’ll make you a bargain. If Coach McDaniels ever asks me to grab a beer with him, I’ll ask. I’m curious. How does your Call to Action stack up to Coach McDaniels’? Do you recognize places where you can get Tough-Smarter?   Here’s to a Broncos win continuing to get Tough-Smart.

Peace begins with me,

Coach Dave